01
Snap the evidence.
Front, rear, side, interior. Four clear photos are all it takes to put your ride on the stand.
Funny diagnostics for real drivers
4 photos.
1 brutal roast.
Your car has been through enough. Now it gets a score, a brutally funny roast, and a share card built for the group chat.
One free roast each week. No account needed to see the verdict.
Roast file #004
Verdict
Still drives. Somehow.
Roast score
86
For entertainment, not a mechanic's diagnosis.
30 sec
from camera roll to roast
4 views
for a visible-condition read
0 jargon
just the roast your ride earned
From driveway to punchline
Same cars. Harsher truths.
We keep the process fast, specific, and gloriously overqualified to judge your cracked bumper.
02
Get the roast.
We turn visible wear, dents, rust, tires, and cabin chaos into an unapologetic verdict.
03
Share the damage.
Save a roast card for the group chat, a duet, or a full public defense of your questionable choices.
The condition cues
Comedy up front. Useful clues underneath.
Every roast calls out what is visibly showing: exterior wear, tire condition, rust, and interior mileage. It is a nudge to look closer—not a repair order.
Visible wear callouts
Shareable verdict card
No fake repair claims
Fix-it prompts when useful
Diagnostic score
The brave little beater
Exterior battle scars74/100
Tire side-eye58/100
Cabin archaeology81/100
This score is entertainment based on what's visible in your photos. If a real issue worries you, let a qualified mechanic inspect it.
Pricing
Pay only when the joke sticks.
Start free. Go unlimited when every questionable vehicle in your camera roll deserves a verdict.
Free roast
$0 / week
One fresh chance to find out what your ride has been hiding in plain sight.
Unlimited roasts
For the whole fleet.
More roasts, saved history, and no mercy.
No surprises
Questions before the roast?
We're here to make a joke, not a false mechanical promise.